Writing in Romance

I have never written a romance novel but I have read a few of the more innocent variety, so I am going to attempt to write in “Romance” to avoid attracting the attention of any readers surfing for a thrill. Why? Because I want to provide some interesting information for those males and females who use bio-identical hormones. I will not pretend to be an expert with boring scientific facts and figures and numerous studies to quote I am only sharing this information to possibly help you use your bio-identical hormones to their best advantage because sometimes (and definitely in my case) your doctor will not fill you in on the nuances of proper application.

I have been searching for answers to many female issues for years and hormones were never my bag unless you want to refer to 3% natural progesterone as a real hormone (something Uzzi Reiss basically discounts). I did try it and then stopped when Dr. Mercola stated that it “accumulates in the fat of your body” and unnatural levels of hormone might be attained. When I started to see a functional medicine doctor he mentioned bio-identical hormones to me and I filed it away for two years and then decided to experiment with a cream, estriol one of the most beneficial forms of estrogen, that you insert in to the sheath like part of the female body (Romance).  Dr. Bruley also suggested that I read some of the information Suzanne Somers has written about bio-identicals, so I started with “Knockout” and now have her book titled “Breakthrough” both of which I highly recommend. I think the book that is fully dedicated to the power of bio-identical hormones is “The Sexy Years” and I have yet to read that one but I have read Uzzi Reiss’ “Natural Hormone Balance” so with my background revealed let me share with those who are interested some of the things I have learned that might make your experience more successful and possibly exciting.

When using bio-identicals it matters where you apply it (female sheath, facial skin, thigh, arm, etc), it works better in certain forms (pill, gel, drop, cream) and times of day all make a difference. These are all things my doctor didn’t share with me. so the following is information above and beyond the necessary. Male readers do not discount this as solely a female issue as many times males could use bio-identicals to their advantage. For example, testosterone in particular will protect you from cardiovascular issues as well as diabetes issues.

Where you apply it is vital because it will be more completely absorbed when applied to certain areas. For instance, estrogen, mostly commonly Tri-est (estrial, estradiol and estrone) and Bi-est (Estradiol and Estriol), is best used in a gel or cream and in this form it should be applied to the face, neck, brow and the inner skin of your lower and upper arm. Testosterone is best utilized when applied in its cream or gel form to the inner thigh, buttocks, small labia or the non-hairy area  between the vagina and rectum called the perineum. It is also used quite successfully, according to Suzanne and Uzzi, when a small amount is gently rubbed on an area of the female body that was best described by the Italian anatomist, Mateo Renaldo Colombo, in 1559 as “amor Veneris, vel dulcedo” the “love or sweetness of Venus”. Yes, “Romance” talk again but apparently its effect is most profound. I will once again use “Romance”  and say that applying Testosterone strategically to the male “shaft of love” can help regain lost rigidity. I bet you would never have thought of these things on your own!

The mode of application you choose is critical. Progesterone is best to take in a slow release tablet according to my pharmacist but it can be applied in droplet form under the tongue (Uzzi Reiss likes the droplets; my pharmacist stated that it is too hard to determine exact quantities and therefore they will do it but they don’t recommend it). Vaginal creams that are inserted, I mean creams inserted in to the “female sheath” (Romance) are a very direct application of the hormone and unlike what many of us have been told it does affect the entire body not just the “female sheath” area. These creams can make the difference for menopausal women or even peri-menopausal women between good conjugation (not so much Romance as Biology 101) and very bad, very painful conjugation. Overall the preferred application for the ones I mention is using a cream or gel for all but Progesterone.

The last but not the least important extraordinary detail is frequency of application. Uzzi Reiss suggests taking Progesterone every 12 hours, so that you have a constant level of Progesterone protecting your body from harm (the Big C). For instance if you are taking it in pill form you could cut your tablet in half and maybe half again, so that you can take most of it at night (it helps you sleep better) and then half with breakfast to keep the level up until bedtime. Tri-est and Bi-est cream (I have no information or knowledge of estrogen patches) may be applied twice a day or as needed to rid you of hot flashes and that pit in your stomach feeling menopausal women sometimes suffer. Dr. Riess suggests experimenting with application and using this “Estrogen Quick Check”:

1. The Breast Check. Touch and feel your breasts if they are tender or painful you are getting too much estrogen. If they seem less full or they are drooping you need more.

2.The Ring Check. Are your rings easily removed and put on? If so, you are taking the right amount. If not, you are taking too much.

3.The Sleep Check. If you are having trouble getting to sleep or your nights are restless you aren’t getting enough. If you wake drenched in sweat you are low. If your hot flashes are minimal but still exist you are still not optimum and you need slightly more.

4.Mind and Mood Check. Are you a little down in the morning? Do you not care how you look? Do you lack a zest for life? You need more estrogen. Are you feeling uptight? Irritable? But your mind is clear? You are probably taking too much and need to take less.

Testosterone cream should be applied in the morning only unless you are using it for recreation purposes and then only tiny amounts are necessary. Signs of too much Testosterone might be increased levels of aggression or bossiness. Suddenly oily skin and/or acne. Also for women coarse facial hair growth and loss of hair on your head may indicate that your levels are too high.

This is only the tip of the iceberg as there are more hormones to be made aware of like DHEA, a hormone produced by the adrenal glands. Cortisol, a corticosteroid produced by the adrenal cortex. HGH (human growth hormone) and thyroid hormones. Rather than go down like the Titanic in to cold, murky unknown territory I am going to keep my head above water and deal with the hormones of which I have some knowledge.  No not carnal knowledge, and no there are no Romance novels being written at our house but suffice it to say I certainly wouldn’t be opposed to “writing” a novel or two, so stay tuned.


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